What a day!

Yesterday morning, at 5:30 am my husband, the “Love of my life”…..suggested I take the day off from all the craziness I’ve been trying to organize….go shopping or down to the lake, forget about the cooking and decorating and gift buying, don’t worry about the laundry and ironing the table linens….

……I thought about it….he is right! I need a day…….and today is that day!

So, by 9:00 I was ready to hit the road……I was feeling pretty good, I made the bed, vacuumed, loaded the dishwasher, fed the dogs & the birds, chopped the ice off the front porch, walked up to the mailbox, slipped three times…..took the dogs out and glanced at the outdoor thermometer….14 degrees…..ok, better go start the jeep……finally it turned over…….now to defrost and scrape the ice from the windows…..slipped on the ice two more times……back in the house….

(the jeep doesn’t need a babysitter while its warming up)

While I’m waiting I’ll write out a few bills, balance the checkbook, and check on whether I need a few things from the grocer…I have to pass that store anyway…..

ok…..jeep is warm enough to drive…..down the mountain, hmmmm……let’s see how nice the lake is…..park the car, get out start to walk down the path to the lake…I’m the only fool down here…its freezing and windy as heck! turn around to go back up the hill, slip again, on the ice and now my back hurts… Back in the jeep – so much for a walk by the lake…..I have now chosen a few words, carefully for my husband…..

While I was out enjoying the lake and the cross-country skiing I did down the hill, he text me……can you please pick up a few things for me?

And so it begins……

From the lake, drive into town, head to tractor supply…pick up thirty pounds of dog food, fifty pounds of wild bird seed, and a few “Gifts” that he forgot to buy…. Do you see where this is going?

Oh, please can you also pick me up coffee and cups for the office? And don’t forget to stop at the post office….”Are you enjoying your day off, honey?”….

Another text comes in…..”Stop by Mike’s ….. You need to get the jeep inspected…..I figured your already in town…..”, While I wait at the station for a “Last minute appointment”…..I’m jotting down ways I could get away with murder…..a shovel? I won’t have the strength…..a bat? I’d probably miss…..I could drop a Christmas tree on him……yeah, explain that one……

Ok…we are now done with all the “Little things” I needed to do first…….I am now headed down to the mall…….pull in to the center and drive around for thirty minutes…no place to park…..unless I want to walk from another zip code…..wait there is a car going out….I speed up, directional on so everyone knows I’m there with a clear purpose….a woman in a Mercedes comes along side of me and ….WHOOOOSSSHHH, she takes the spot!

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?………

Well needless to say she will need to visit a collision shop this week……and if I were her I would check the rear tires……now into the mall, which is standing room only…..and if one more person wants to cover me in a rose scented perfume at $160.00 an ounce…I will hit them……It now takes me longer to find my jeep then it did to end up with two ugly tops that I bought, that I know will have to go back after Christmas! how did I find the jeep? easy…I hit my panic button and follow the alarm sound…..apologies to the elderly couple parked next to me who almost fainted when my alarm went off……

Back on the road headed home……Text coming in……”Hi…how’s your day?” “Hey, your new mirror for the jeep just came in….want to pick it up?”

Ok….Christmas tree would be too symbolic……I could probably take him if he didn’t see me coming! well, back in town pick up the mirror…….

it’s now 3:00 pm…..It’s so damn c0ld I could cry! ….homeward bound – me, the jeep – filled to capacity – and the new mirror……..

Pull in front of the house….now, carry in the dog food, bird food, groceries, his groceries, his gifts, don’t forget the bill for the inspection, receipt for the packages delivered to the post office, and did I tell you about the quick stop at Lowe’s and BurgerKing?

Put everything away, fill the bird feeders, walk the dogs, put dinner, Ala Burgers & fries in the microwave….gather firewood to start a fire…no kindling…..

….where is his Bernzomatic? One way or another I’m starting a fire in my fireplace!

At 5:00 pm, my husband, that guy I live with, walks in…all smiles! “Hi!”…..with that look on his face….(the same look I’m sure the Mercedes owner had when she came back to her car….) “How was your day?”  How was my day?  I’m sitting, with my second martini in  hand,  in front of a fire that I started with a tool that cuts metal, a heating pad on my back from falling down at the lake you told me to go to, wearing BOTH ugly tops (Tags still on) that I bought at the mall from hell, and watching the bear enjoy the “filled to capacity” birdfeeders that I just filled!

Oh honey, I had a great day! dinner is in the microwave…and do me a favor? walk outside the front door, step off the porch and look up….see the Christmas tree hanging precariously up on the porch roof? Stand there and admire it for a moment….nah, I tied it up good….it won’t fall on you!…

                                                         oooops…….

42334

 

 To all of you – have a great day!  

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Updates in Your Inbox!

Comments

  1. So, how was your day off??

  2. I love this! Sorry to laugh at your day but it was fun reading. I saw the FB post on it this morning but saved it for tonight to read. I knew it would be good.

    That man you live with? He is so much like mine. Come to think about it, he’s like many men so you are not alone! His time will come though, won’t it?

    Dewena

    P.S. Have you ever tried Blue Emu on your back? Nothing but a trip to chiropractor works any better for us.

Leave a Comment

*